These Slippers are Toast!

slipper

Seriously what’s the deal?  I’m not a 90 year old woman and I’d prefer not to advertise the fact that I’ve got a touch of bogan in me* to the world. So how is it that I can’t find a tasteful, stylish, hell, I’d settle for bland and boring at this point, pair of slippers to save myself?

The market seems to consist of either “fun”, read I’ve got the taste and intellect of a 12 year old and want a pair of shoes with ears or a face on them or “fugly”  ugg boots or old lady shoes.  There is simply nothing in between.  All I want is a pair of plain black slippers that don’t draw attention to themselves, I’m not asking for much am I?

For the last six years since moving to wine country I’ve been on the hunt – it gets cold out here and now I have a yard that I venture into some mornings (only to scare the birds away so the cats don’t eat them you understand, I don’t stroll around surveying my domain, well not that I’m letting on about anyway!) so socks or bare feet won’t cut it anymore.

Besides, I’ve invested a lot in nice sleepwear and being a long term fan of the correct accessories I’d rather freeze than ruin my “look” with the wrong shoe.

An extensive internet search the world over led me to Macy’s who had dull but tasteful ballet slippers that met my two major style criteria;

  1. No “old lady” bow
  2. Not made of velour

I joyfully ordered said slippers, and, while I was at it a new cocktail dress, to justify the postage you understand – No, I didn’t fool me with that logic either, but I ordered the dress anyway.  Two weeks later the dress showed up but no shoes, apparently there had been a run on the only acceptable footwear  I’d found (probably by frustrated, well dressed middle aged women, but I digress) and they had sold out, not to be restocked.

Frustrated I began my search again, convinced that somewhere in the world there would be an acceptable pair of black stylish slippers.  And you know what I was right, for the asking price of a mere $600 I could have a pair that almost looked the part.  Even though I was desperate by this stage my inner tight arse suggested that $600 was a touch extreme even for me when I’m annoyed  – I can be impulsive, mostly it’s charming, sometimes irrationally expensive!

So I took myself off to the nearest shopping centre and slouched my way through the various stores muttering** to myself that none of it was good enough and finally I bought the marginally acceptable “items” that you see above.

I took them home and optimistically teamed them with my lovely robe and night gown and you know what, they look dreadful!    So, these slippers are toast and my hunt goes on!

*it’s an Australian thing, we all do, we can’t help it.

**It wasn’t all doom and gloom however to cheer myself up I bought two new shirts from Cue that I’m loving.

PS: As you can tell I have so much distain for the slippers I didn’t even wipe the toaster down before taking the shot LOL.  Also, I was going to use winky faces in this post but have just discovered that giving your face a “nose” is now old fashioned, when did that happen?   I must be old  😉  … a face needs a “nose” right?

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